icularlyrelaxedaboutsex.I’vehadfivesexpartnersinmyentirelife.OncewhenIwastwenty-oneandadebutante.Thenwithmyhusband,whomImetwhenIwastwenty-fiveandwhoturnedouttobeabastard.AndthenafewtimeswiththreeguysImetseveralyearsapart.Butyouprovokedsomethinginme.Isimplycouldn’tgetenough.Ithadsomethingtodowiththefactthatyou’resoundemanding.”
“Cecilia,youdon’thaveto…”
“Shh—don’tinterrupt,orI’llneverbeabletotellyouthis.”
Blomkvistsatinsilence.
“ThedayyouleftforprisonIwasabsolutelymiserable.Youweregone,asthoughyouhadneverexisted.Itwasdarkhereintheguesthouse.Itwascoldandemptyinmybed.AndthereIwas,anoldmaidoffifty-sixagain.”
ShesaidnothingforawhileandlookedBlomkvistintheeyes.
“Ifellinlovewithyoulastwinter.Ididn’tmeanto,butithappened.AndthenItookstockandrealisedthatyouwereonlyheretemporarily;onedayyou’llbegoneforgood,andI’llstayherefortherestofmylife.IthurtsodamnmuchthatIdecidedIwasn’tgoingtoletyouinagainwhenyoucamebackfromprison.”
“I’msorry.”
“It’snotyourfault.WhenyoulefttonightIsatandcried.IwishIhadthechancetolivemylifeoveragain.ThenIwoulddecideonohing.”
“What’sthat?”
Shelookeddownatthetable.
“ThatIwouldhavetobetotallyinsaostopseeingyoujustbecauseyou’regoingtoleaveoneday.Mikael,canwestartagain?Canyoufetwhathappenedearlierthisevening?”
“It’sfotten,”hesaid.“Butthankyoufortellingme.”
Shewasstilllookingdownatthetable.
“Ifyoustillwantme,let’sdoit.”
Shelookedathimagain.Thenshegotupandwentovertothebedroomdoor.Shedroppedherjacketonthefloorandpulledherdressoverherheadasshewent.
BlomkvistandCeciliaVangerwokeupwhenthefrontdooropenedandsomeonewaswalkingthroughthekitchen.Theyheardthethudofsomethingheavybeingputdownnearthewoodstove.ThenBergerwasstandinginthebedroomdoorwaywithasmilethatrapidlychangedtoshock.
“Oh,goodLord.”Shetookastepback.
“Hi,Erika,”Blomkvistsaid.
“Hi.I’msosorry.Iapologiseathousandtimesforbarginginlikethis.Ishouldhaveknocked.”
“Weshouldhavelocke