,areyouattractedtome?”
Armanskysatasifparalysed,whiledesperatelywonderinghowtoanswer.Hisfirstimpulsewastopretendtobeinsulted.Thenhesawherexpressionanditcametohimthatthiswasthefirsttimeshehadeverutteredanysuchpersonalquestion.Itwasseriouslymeant,andifhetriedtolaughitoffshewouldtakeitasanaffront.Shewantedtotalktohim,andhewonderedhowlongithadtakenhertogetupthecouragetoaskthatquestion.Heslowlyputdownhispenandleanedbackinhischair.Finallyherelaxed.
“Whatmakesyouthinkthat?”hesaid.
“Thewayyoulookatme,andthewayyoudon’tlookatme.Andthetimesyouwereabouttoreachoutyourhandandtouchmebutstoppedyourself.”
Hesmiledather.“Ireckonyou’dbiteoffmyhandifIlaidafingeronyou.”
Shedidnotsmile.Shewaswaiting.
“Lisbeth,I’myourboss,andevenifIwereattractedtoyou,I’dneveractonit.”
Shewasstillwaiting.
“Betweenus—yes,therehavebeentimeswhenIhavefeltattractedtoyou.Ican’texplainit,butthat’sthewayitis.ForsomereasonIdon’treallyunderstand,Ilikeyoualot.Butit’snotaphysicalthing.”
“That’sgood.Becauseit’llneverhappen.”
Armanskylaughed.Thefirsttimeshehadsaidsomethingpersonalanditwasthemostdishearteningnewsamancouldimaginereceiving.Hestruggledtofindtherightwords.
“Lisbeth,Iunderstandthatyou’renotinterestedinanoldmanoffiftyplus.”
“I’mnotinterestedinanoldmanoffiftypluswho’smyboss.”Sheheldupahand.“Wait,letmespeak.You’resometimesstupidandmaddeninglybureaucratic,butyou’reactuallyanattractiveman,and…Icanalsofeel…Butyou’remybossandI’vemetyourwifeandIwanttokeepmyjobwithyou,andthemostidioticthingIcoulddoisgetinvolvedwithyou.”
Armanskysaidnothing,hardlydaringtobreathe.
“I’mawareofwhatyou’vedoneforme,andI’mnotungrateful.Iappreciatethatyouactuallyshowedyourselftobegreaterthanyourprejudicesandhavegivenmeachancehere.ButIdon’twantyouformylover,andyou’renotmyfather.”
AfterawhileArmanskysighedhelplessly.“Whatexactlydoyouwantfromme?”
“Iwanttocontinueworkingforyou.Ifthat’sOKwithyou.”
Henoddedandthenansweredherashones